So, Annie, how does a young girl like you end up in a big house on her own, without any parents to supervise her?
Well, I’m not quite on my own. I’m just picky about who gets to come in. I have pets, you know. My kitten, Hugh Shalby Nameless, is the cu-Hugh-test thing. And there’s my toad, Much Misunderstood. He’s pretty slimy, but he’s nicer to look at than my parents! They’ve been … um … mislaid. And then there are the members of the club…
Tell us a bit more about the Nightmare Club.
The Nightmare Club is all about telling stories. I love a good scary story. But it has to be REALLY scary. I mean knock-your-socks-off, keep-the-lights-on, no-sleep-ever-again kind of scary. Super-spooky. Extra-eerie. Truly terrifying. You get the gist.
And who gets to go? Can I come to the next Nightmare Club sleepover?
Pchh! I don’t think you’re ready for it. Everyone has to tell a story – and it better be really good, or you get sent home. We’ve had stories about zombies and haunted guinea pigs and Franken-creatures put together by mad scientists. Can you tell a scarier story than those? No? Didn’t think so. No wusses are invited to the Nightmare Club!
Don’t you get nightmares after the Nightmare Club meets up?
Me? Nightmares? PAH! Hardly. I’m too tough for that. Well, mostly, anyway. I mean, some of the things I’ve heard really have creeped me out. But wouldn’t you freak out too, if you were trapped inside your mirror, looking into your own bedroom? Eeeeeeeek!
That does sound scary. What’s the worst story anyone’s ever told you?
Once, one of my ‘friends’ told some silly spoof story about a mummy raiding her bathroom cabinet for bandages. We’re not friends any more, of course. That kind of stuff is about as scary as Hugh Shalby Nameless playing the keyboard (which is SO adorable). And it was SO not true. What I want are REAL stories about things that REALLY happened. So any ghosties and ghouls will disqualify you from the club.
Do you bring treats along to these sleepovers?
Obviously. I’m the hostess so naturally my guests bring me goodies to butter me up and try to stay in the club. Rot chocolate, jelly eyeballs, ice-screeeeeam, death by chocolate – you name it; we’ve got it. Although sometimes the stories are so stomach-turningly gross, you might not want to eat.
The Wolfling’s Bite has lots of blood. And nose-picking.
Where do you get your ideas from?
Well, I’m pretty much a genius, but you wouldn’t understand that. My house is pretty creepy, so I guess it helps that the window in the basement always bangs open and closed. And some people think my cauldron’s a bit spooky too – but that’s just for making the rot chocolate. Anyway, even though I’m the best storyteller there is, I AM the host. So I have to listen to other people’s stories a LOT before I tell one of my own. So they better be up to scratch…
Do you make a lot of money as an author?
HA! Shows what you know. What would I need money for? I have a constant supply of goodies from the Club. The electricity people are too afraid of me to switch my supply off, even though I haven’t paid them in YEARS. And my publishers come in and feed the toad every now and then. Hugh looks after himself. Lets just say there aren’t too many mice in the basement any more. Or rats. Or anything else, for that matter.
So will there be more books in the Nightmare Club series?
Definitely. My publishers are too scared of me to say no. One time, my editor tried to change one of the stories I told, and I sent her some of Hugh’s kitteny toenail clippings in the post. HA! That showed her!
How old are you anyway?
Twelve. Same age as these socks. Care to come closer?
Er, no thanks. Who draws the pictures for the books?
Some guy called Glenn McElhinney. I suppose he’s pretty good actually. He drew a really gruesome one of that
zombie kid’s fingernail – that one really turned me green. That’s where I got the idea for the gift to my editor!
Last question: what’s your favourite scary movie?
Movies are for losers. I’m an author, you know – my books are better than any film you can think of. Better than any other books too. Or games, obviously. The only movie I’D want to watch would be one about my Nightmare Club. Now, haven’t you asked enough questions?
Is it about time for a story?
